KARAOKE WITH BAE

Thursdays are usually really long days, no classes and definitely no chores, just books and probably a movie, if am lucky.Today was no different, being in campus is probably the most cliche place of all , you develop a routine and you stick to it for so long it automatically becomes who you are.My Robert Lundlum 'The Road to Omaha' is now torn in three different places, its not that I am careless, I have read this book for more than a month I just don't get it.
So I evade reading it and turn to a movie which sends me crying, The Fault in our Stars makes you cry no matter how much of a man you are, trust me,I know...! The day has been more disappointing than all other of its kind how to make it better? Ooh yes, I got it, I rush through my contact list so fast you'd think there were free bundles at the end of it, Meg, that karaoke song bird is going to make everything better. I dial, three beeps and she isn't picking up, what is going on? My day needs salvation.
"Hello," she answers like she just did me a favor by just picking up.
"Hey Meg, its Tessy, just wondering are you working karaoke tonight?"
"eeeeh, (scoffs na madharau) I was actually asleep so I can work better."
"sorreeee" I say noticing her dismissal.
"Hahahahaha, so that means you are coming, see you to night!" then she hangs up.
Half my plan is complete now I just need to get Bae to come with me so it will not be a lonely night. This will be a perfect night. He will come pick me up, it doesn't matter whether it is with a bicycle, a tri-cycle,(according to Stella those are real) maybe a motorbike or even a car( a girl can dream right?) All I know is that he is gentleman enough to do so.
One thing am sure about is that he'll be pissed because I will not be ready yet, but I know how to smoothen his frown. He love's it when he gets to pick out my outfit and so do I. It simply means that all through the nigh he will have his eyes on me.
I get ready fast, thanks to the secondary school system I went through. A perfect date night, at Karaoke we normally just sit and laugh at people make fun of themselves and I am usually okay with it, I don't get why you would do that but its okay. Today however, that handsome sexy beast gets on stage and he wants to sing but guess what? He can't sing even if his life depended on it. Meg walks towards me smiling, more like grinning at me mischievously. I hate it when she does that and my instincts agree, my heart contracts... this is not going to be good!
Bae starts singing and walking towards me, please note that at this particular moment and time I am dead, a gone case. Oooh ISHT! (pardon my french). He gets to me , takes my hand and walks me to the stage, he gives me a microphone than all hell breaks loose. I sing, Okay, hold up, I SING! Those who know me can attest to the fact that my voice is worse than my problem with mathematics and I am a (Daudi msalabani kind of chick)
Its not a big deal though, yesterday it would have been, today earlier on it would have been but at this moment and place it is not. People laugh, its only fair, I laugh at them but I don't even care. When I look into his beautiful, drowning, hazel eyes, the joy that comes from seeing me make a fool of myself is evident. He always says how much he hates it when I mind people's opinions. On that stage his opinion is all that  matters, the love I have for this man is greater than pride, deeper than shame and bigger than my ego.
Ooh for one tiny detail, Hey Bae, come out, come out wherever you are, see how am planning dates yet I don't even know you. Kindly show up before Meg stops doing karaoke.

THE REASON I AM A MAN

The question of identity is one of the most frequently asked questions. Now this leads people to fall into different categories as a form of self identification which in turn leads them to believe certain facts about themselves that are not even roughly right. Transgender is an issue I will never get to understand fully, I am African so the idea of a child coming home and telling their parents," Hey mum, dad, I think I should have been born a boy not a girl( or vice-versa)." I do not condone. Please do not quote me by saying that I categorized Africans as primitive thinkers, if fighting against what I think is religiously wrong is primitive then so be it.This only applies to me.
A short while back I read a book by John Eldredge,Wild at Heart and the caption at the bottom is what really got me interested. " discovering the secrets of a man's heart." Why you may ask? hold your peace am going to explain.
Just for clarification purposes for my confused readers, I am a woman, by all means necessary. I have however always had a problem with my male counterparts. The most frequent one being that I almost always want to grow a pair, not physically though. The other problem being that I cannot seem to keep one, if you know why, keep that one to yourself.This  book led me to a personal revelation, that I have a huge pair, I just never really noticed it.
All my short life I have always been excessively outspoken, I can already hear some of you nod in agreement, its okay I know. Growing up I identified myself with my father more that my mama dearest. While everyone walked around and visited people, my father sat at home and read a book, or scribbled something into his notebook, and that is who I wanted to be. Maybe its the aspect of uniqueness in masculinity that I
seek after because women are somewhat alike, again I said, SOMEWHAT.
According to my newly found word magician, Kamwega keep calm you are still my undisputed favorite blogger, gender is a matter of the spirit. Created by God in His own likeness yet He does not posses a physical body.
I am a man, in all ways but physically.
My father taught me to be a man and I think I am pulling it all fine.